Mid East Undersea Cable Mystery-Solved!

Dubai (CMN)- As conspiracy theories build over the sudden and "mysterious"disconnect of 5 intercontinental data cables connecting large areas of Asia, the Middle East and North Africa. A small team of specialized "cable divers" went down to investigate the reason for the sudden destruction.

What they discovered this week has shocked the world and answered the nagging question "Where did 5 Billion Dollars earmarked for Iraq's reconstruction go?".

Dive team leader John Magor from Dubai Salvage and Tow came right to the point, "We discovered an entire underwater city, complete with working tram lines (click image) that had inadvertently cut these cables when they ran over them". "This city is brand new, with hundreds buildings...even a Starbucks!".

The US State Department put out the following press release this afternoon, " Yes, dammit, we did build an entire city for 800,000 underwater. Everything we built above water in Iraq was being blown up, so we thought this was a good use of the Taxpayers money".

The following Underwater Onion was brought to you by Shark Diver. Seriously, this whole undersea cable thing is a bit spooky.