Thursday, February 26, 2009

The Long Hand of Dick - Conspiracy

This week a NASA satellite launch sent a 278 million dollar Carbon Observatory into the cold, dark waters of the Antarctic.

Conspiracy theorists are screaming foul claiming the "Long Hand of Dick Cheney". Their theory goes something like this:

1. Dick Cheney, minion of big energy, sought to derail the Carbon Observatory from day one. Keeping an eye on rising carbon gas levels is not good for the coal or oil guys.

2. Many of Dicks senate buddies, who believe in The Rapture were helping Dick derail this project. They (senate buddies) do not believe in global warming as a general rule and no new "wacky science" was going to change that view.

3. The satellite failure was a direct result of industrial sabotage brought about by unnamed "Friends of Dick".

So there it is. But a look through the lens of Occam's Razor suggests that this floating observatory might have actually failed with a 59 cent lowest-government-bid widget that misfired at a critical moment.

Or the Rapture Guys made it happen with the help of Big Oil and Coal.

Most disturbing in any of this, is not the loss of a 278 million dollar bird, not the fact that Dick Cheney et al hate global is that fact that members of our government who have the ability to direct and change government policy for the rest of us actually believe in The Rapture.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Waddaya got 'gianst the Rapture you Ivy League pisspot!