Showing posts with label bogus news. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bogus news. Show all posts

Friday, May 6, 2011

Shark Diving - Guarding a Global Industry

Unfortunately there are those who would use our global $400 million dollar industry for their own ends.

Some are well known shark experts based in Florida, whose Pavlovian response to cameras pushed into their face is to spout anti-shark diving rhetoric ad nauseam - without any empirical data to back them up.

Others are media based hatchet men, who use fear, industry images and soundtracks to boost ratings, trolling the basest of human emotions to slander operations without providing balance, nuance, and research (yes research) to highlight our industry.

Against these seasonal onslaughts of Shakespearean intrigue towards a thriving global industry stand a few blogs who take to task the failings of these few well voiced and misguided individuals, and we ask that you take a stand as well.

Collectively we have the horsepower to push back against those who might seek to harm our industry. The media consistently calls upon a few outside our community for quotes about shark diving because no one else has stood up to be heard.

In a media vacuum the small minded will always work from the nearest "shark contact rolodex" and it is high time we changed that, as the current rolodex is filled with misinformation, slander, and moronic statements.

It is also high time we started pushing back when we see stories like those that appeared out from the primordial ooze last week in Australia. Fashioned by a 1970's era media hack by the name of Anthony Hoy Media who's entire "shark diving research department" came from a dog eared copy of Jaws he found in a rubbish bin at the back of a bar he had been frequenting last month.

Fortunately there's Mike aka Da Shark, or as we like to call him "The Shark Diving Industries Rottweiler," who is more than happy to lead by example and take to task those who would seek to use the hard work and dedication of many within our industry for their own sad ends.

Well done.

Mike on Anthony Hoy's Expose.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Steve Jobs Passes - Monks Depart Lhasa

SAN FRANCISCO (Tech News) -  Apple Inc chief and tech icon Steve Jobs death sent shivers through investors who fear a change at the top will chill a product line-up struggling to come up with the next big thing.



In a surprising twist, 12 Lamas departed from Lhasa this morning bound for Silicon Valley triggered by an apparent request from Apples Chief Operating Officer Tim Cook.

In an interview today Cook said, "the Lamas will be here to seek out the reincarnated spiritual leader of Apple".

Apple staff have reportedly set aside items in a sealed case that Steve Jobs used on a daily basis, a comb, an iPod and pair of reading glasses.

Editors Note: Steve Jobs we are going to miss you. Genius, recognized in it time, is a gift that few get to enjoy.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

US Navy Builds Deep Water Shark Cage

The US Navy's Deepwater Reconnaissance and Autonomous Gateway or DRAG unveiled it's $120 million dollar shark cage yesterday to a group of cheering engineers and at least one congressman from New Jersey.

The DRAG "cage" was originally designed to explore the Antarctic but design set backs and a cost overruns scuttled the first project back in 1972.

DRAG reinstated it's shark protection project with the help of Pentagon Emergency Supplemental funding for Iraq and have now launched the first multi million dollar shark cage in the history of the US Navy. Three more units are scheduled to come online in 2009 and 2010.

"We hope to deploy these units in hot zones around the planet" said Vice Admiral Peter Loyd "we have ongoing operational plans for this unit in the Tigress river in Iraq after the discovery of Bull Sharks there".

The following Underwater Onion was brought to you by Shark Diver. Yes, we know it's been a while since the last U/O but we have been busy;)